I’m one of those few jokers who started working much later. Most of my friends had started much earlier since they had graduated much earlier too. Stories from them are less encouraging, sad to say. It seems like there are only two swinging path- you either feel miserable or tired of your job.
Miserable is mainly because, either the job is not paying well, the company/ boss is terrible, or they simply find the job boring/ difficult.
Tiring is when the job requires too much of them. But they don’t really mind because they are mostly getting reasonably better pay.
As for me, I’m treating my job as a learning experience. I don’t really mind the lower pay, and I don’t really mind the long hours dedicated. Having more than one boss, it can be difficult to please all of them. But after those few weeks, it’s slowly eating me up and I’m feeling it.
Every week, I told myself not to repeat certain mistakes. But consequences have told me that I’ve been unconciously repeated them. I thought I’ve made the effort, but most of the time, nothing really changed. So, if I’ve been putting in effort, but bore no fruit, it’s as good as effort wasted. So at the end of the day, I felt tired, and for nothing.
So, it’s slowly dawning on to me that I’m taking on everything negative from both those paths; I sometimes feel rather miserable and tired. Is learning suppose to be that? Could there be another, better choice? I don’t know.
I look at what I’ve done so far and I’m not all that happy with my progress, if there’s one to begin with. I don’t see myself growing yet as I’ve constantly making some same old mistake. Terrible.
I suppose I just have to try harder. And the aftereffect would be more beer and cigarette. Terrible.
I hope to see the light.
